chaplin, chappell, and chappelle

october '24

Apparently Charlie Chaplin entered a Charlie Chaplin lookalike contest in the 1910s and didn’t even make it passed the first round. He lost to a bunch of people who were considered “more Charlie Chaplin” than Charlie Chaplin himself. Which leads me to believe that perception doesn’t always equal authenticity, especially in a world where our identities are distorted through media.

The majority of us can’t cohesively or concisely self-identity, whether on a job application or a dating profile. It takes me weeks to think of two truths and a lie, don’t ask me what my favorite color is… I don’t know who I am. But maybe you do? You’ve read enough of these newsletters to have an idea who of I am, right? Or at least you can piece together a puzzle version of my identity through 4 years of this newsletter, a decade of Instagram photos, some funny tweets from my highschool years, a dig through my Venmo history or Facebook profile. You can probably write a more accurate biography about me than I can.

But will our versions tell the same story? I’d argue that the person that I’ve chosen to embody in this digital world is not the person that I am in real life. My identity is one thing in my head, but another thing on the screen. And it’s not that I intend to be fake or mislead your sweet little subscriptions, but just the nature of an identity. I’m a figment of your imagination just as much as I am an authentic being of reality.

Would you say the same about yourself?

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i’m feeling lucky

This month’s playlist is the sonic equivalent of ‘having a subpar summer but still reminiscing in a way that fakes nostalgia’. The majority of this month’s 40 tracks feature smaller artists but we’ve still got appearances from some headliners like Chappell Roan, Thundercat, and Still Woozy.

[Archive playlist can be found here, and in my spotify bio]

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the rise and fall of a midwest princess

Chappell Roan will likely end up in my Spotify wrapped top artists of the year list. I’ve listened to Red Wine Supernova a dozen times just this week, and just a month ago, I didn’t know she existed. She came out of nowhere - an overnight success from a decade in the making. She’s been waiting tables and playing shows for years now, but I don’t think even she expected the monstrous crowds at Lollapalooza and Austin City Limits. Chappell Roan's 80s-era, girlypop dance ballads have created the biggest surge in pop music since the end of the pandemic.

It’s one thing to have to deal with a few extra commas in your bank account but another thing to face the pressure of society. Ofcourse, as an artist or musician or limelight-centered-figure, you consent to a certain interpersonal relationship with the public eye, whether it’s what you say on Instagram Live or the lipgloss you inevitably endorse. But Roan has taken a stubborn stance with her followers, making it clear that she does not owe anyone, anything. She set her boundaries tight, demanding respect from the get-go - very valid. In an instagram post with the comments turned off, she said,

“There is a part of myself that I save just for my project and for all of you. There is a part of myself that is just for me, and I don’t want that taken away from me.” [Instagram]

I have nothing but respect for such an aggressive stance, especially in a world where social media often builds up certain personas or expectations for artists, which can be at odds with their true selves. Pushing back on that narrative is a net-positive movement at a social scale. But the key thing to note with any public figure as they rise over the peaks of fame, is that their platform becomes a specimen under a very large microscope. Each and every one of their words is criticized, disputed, and conflated. With great power comes great responsibility, and it came at Chappell Roan fast.

“I have so many issues with our government in every way,” she says. “There are so many things that I would want to change. So I don’t feel pressured to endorse someone. There’s problems on both sides. I encourage people to use your critical thinking skills, use your vote – vote small, vote for what’s going on in your city.” [The Guardian]

Chappell Roan’s abstinence in a political endorsement drove Democrats insane but can you really blame her? We've seen the ripple effects of celebrity endorsements in politics - Taylor Swift's support for Kamala Harris mobilized young voters, while Elon Musk's implicit backing of Trump sparked heated debates across social media. The weight of a public figure's words cannot be overstated.

There's a reason why these people surround themselves with publicists and lawyers - everything they say has the potential to sway opinions, influence decisions, and even shape cultural/political narratives. While it's admirable to maintain authenticity and speak one's mind, the responsibility that comes with a large following demands careful consideration. Roan's foray into political talk, while well-intentioned, highlighted the delicate balance between personal expression and public influence.

But I still question why we expect perfection from celebrities, particularly on complex issues that even the most informed among us grapple with. I would love for the war genocide in Gaza to end tomorrow and for the cost of medicare to be lower and for the job market to restabilize, but somehow these are congruently impossible asks.

It seems there's a tendency to project an image of omniscience onto successful people, as if their achievements in one arena translate to expertise in all aspects of life. And that’s feels unfair and unrealistic. Perhaps it stems from a desire for certainty in an uncertain world - we look to these figures for comfort, hoping their perceived success means they have all the answers.

The truth is, I'm not sure what to expect from these celebrities or how much weight to give their words. Pink Pony Club still blasts through my Jetta's speakers on repeat, but Chappell Roan's political hot takes aren’t going to make my 2024 Spotify Wrapped. And that’s a perfect nuance. She can exist in multitudes and so can I. The 1000-true-fan concept doesn’t have to exist in many circumstances - we can learn to discern celebrities’ humanity from their art. That's the real power we hold as an audience - the ability to jam out to white girl anthems while taking the singer’s hot takes with a grain of salt.

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through my eyes

I did it - I went on a photo walk. My friend Franklin and I took to the streets of East Austin with our bikes and cameras, capturing what sunshine was left on a Saturday evening. The last time I did that was probably February… wow. But nothing too fancy with this frame, just soft setting light on an inviting table for two, with a suitor fast-approaching.

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the biggest dream in the room wins

Through all five years of college, I kept a diligent dream journal. Every morning, or at least the mornings after I had a dream, I would roll over from a deep sleep and jot random jumbles of words into my Notes app - still half-asleep with the dream fading from memory within seconds. Here are some silly excerpts:

• “obamas personal driver in a mclaren”

• “im in italy somewhere and it seems like im on vacation but also need to find a job. so i get a job delivering food on a boat with a family company”

• “at some rodeo fair thing and theres a bear invasion and i tackled one and brought it down while the rest of the ppl just ran around”

It’s been a few years since I recorded a dream in my journal, but I was reminded of the concept while watching the documentary series How To with John Wilson. He finds himself at an Avatar club meeting, where the attendees are not only fanatics of the James Cameron movie and speak Na’vi quite proficiently, but also resonate deeply with the escapist element of dreaming as a way to slip into alternate worlds that offer freedom from the limitations of our waking selves. These fanatics see themselves in Jake Sully as he escapes into a second body, one unburdened by disability and filled with a renewed purpose. It’s a form of liberation, an invitation to live as though we’re in some parallel universe where possibility is infinite and the self is boundless.

“When someone describes a dream to you, they’re asking you to care about something that never actually happened. you can try to grasp onto details that you can relate to but in order to appreciate it, you need to be willing to immerse yourself in a fantasy world.” (How To with John Wilson, S2E5)

Dave Chappelle touches on a similar concept in his Netflix special, The Dreamer. He reflects on the life he lives now - the fame, the influence, the cultural weight - as something he dreamt about long ago. In that way, he poses the concept of a dream to be more alike that of manifestation. Through dreaming, we manifest the diverse spirits within us, expanding our sense of self into second lives where potential knows no bounds. We can try on different skins, explore multiple possibilities and toy with potential futures.

“In any given moment, the strongest dream in that moment wins that moment. […] “You have to be wise enough to know when you’re living your dream, and humble enough to know when you’re in someone else’s.” (Dave Chappelle in The Dreamer)

Instead of waiting and hoping for the future, our dreams influence the present reality in a way that prepares the soul/mind/heart/body with seeds of aspiration. We can either overthink current burdens and sink into an abyss of anxiety, but the positive inertia of this phenomenon is the ability to escape that reality and understand what other forms our identity could take.

There’s a gentle magic in letting our dreams inspire us without expecting them to dictate our lives. Most of the times these thoughts are fleeting, unbothered and unsuspecting. There’s no need to fall in love with your dreams, but just flirt a little. Take a stroll through the park and hold hands for a bit, feel and realize the magic.

“Dreams show you the narratives you hide from yourself during the day. You play them out fully while you’re asleep and paralyzed so they don’t get you killed or shamed. Dreams are private windows into your animating spirits. If you dare to look, you can bring to awareness your own maladjusted myths.” (James Taylor Foreman on Substack)

“What does it mean to be a dreamer?”

This is Dave Chappelle’s big question in the Netflix special, and I feel like it’s more of an invitation to embrace the multitudes we embody. In the same way I can’t expect perfection from celebrities, I can’t expect a singular version of myself. To dream is to make space for many selves. And while most of that space may exist only in my own mind, it’s proof that those alternate realities can exist somewhere.

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link dump

the fastest maze solving competition in the world

imagine if you could turn the sun on with a flip of the switch

the $5 footlong at subway is long gone history

the truth about hurricane geoengineering

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It’s been a rough few months - I’m still shedding the emotional weight from my last post. My birthday is next week and I’m leaning into the shifting energies and changing of the seasons that comes with the closure of another trip around the sun. Call me “woo-woo”, whatever.

If anything in this post resonated with you, consider sharing it with your closest friend and/or dropping a tiny turd comment below. I’d love to hear your thoughts on how we perceive personalities through digital media, and who you choose to be in your dreams.

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have a lovely October, folks

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My last post was an emotionally heavy one:

where is the sun taking us?